The context: This is from a show I've written called Nothing Like Broadway!. It's what happens when two rival super-spies hide out in a tiny off-Broadway theater (not knowing the other is doing the same). This is the character introduction song for Bixby, a British secret agent. Like James Bond, but less-so.
A little about the creation of the song: So I was trying for a while to figure out what this song was going to be. James Bond songs have a very specific sound, and I liked the idea of that. But not for the whole song. Then I remembered that one of my favorite things in the world is Gilbert & Sullivan! So, for a good-natured, self-serious, but only semi-competent British character, what could be more appropriate! So it's sort of both of those things. Plus, it's funny to me that he has to sing his own theme song. Like, it's just a little embarrassing that Shirley Bassey or Tom Jones or Adele or someone isn't doing it. Also, why is being famous a good thing for a spy? And it's a very fun song to perform.
A little about the creation of the song: So I was trying for a while to figure out what this song was going to be. James Bond songs have a very specific sound, and I liked the idea of that. But not for the whole song. Then I remembered that one of my favorite things in the world is Gilbert & Sullivan! So, for a good-natured, self-serious, but only semi-competent British character, what could be more appropriate! So it's sort of both of those things. Plus, it's funny to me that he has to sing his own theme song. Like, it's just a little embarrassing that Shirley Bassey or Tom Jones or Adele or someone isn't doing it. Also, why is being famous a good thing for a spy? And it's a very fun song to perform.
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The World's Most Famous Spy
Music & Lyrics by David Rackoff BIXBY WHEN I WAS A LAD, I STUDIED MATHS. I READ UP ON MY SHAKESPEARE, AND I TOOK LONG BATHS. LONG BATHS! AT UNI, I DID BOTH MY PARENTS PROUD. I GRADUATED EARLY, SUMMA CUMMA LOUD. I THREW MY CAP A WAY UP HIGH. I SAID, “I’M GONNA BE THE WORLD’S MOST FAMOUS SPY!”. I PASSED THE SUPER-SPY EXAM. OTHERS HE PASSED THE SUPER-SPY EXAM. BIXBY THEN, ALL AT ONCE, I FOUND I AM: THE MOST FAMOUS SPY… IN THE WORLD! MY FIRST SECRET JOB, IN EAST BERLIN, I KILLED A SUPER-VILLAIN WITH A BOBBY PIN. THIS PIN! HIS HENCH-WOMAN BRIBED ME WITH MARKS AND FRANCS. SHE WANTED TO SEDUCE ME, BUT I SAID, “NO THANKS”. SHE AIMED A LASER AT MY EYE, THEN SAID, “HEY, AREN’T YOU THE WORLD’S MOST FAMOUS SPY?!”. I SAID, “GIVE UP YOUR LIFE OF CRIME”. OTHERS HE SAID, “GIVE UP YOUR LIFE OF CRIME”. BIXBY AND SO SHE DID, AND THAT’S WHY I’M: THE MOST FAMOUS SPY… IN THE WORLD! MY FAME IS A BLESSING, AND A CURSE. WENT UNDERCOVER AS A FILIPINA NURSE. HOT NURSE! A DOCTOR WAS TRYING TO KILL THE POPE. I STRANGLED OUT THE DOCTOR WITH A STETHOSCOPE. HE SAID TO ME, ABOUT TO DIE, “YOU’RE NOT A NURSE, NO, YOU’RE ZHAT VERY FAMOUS SPY. I ZHINK I ZAW YOU ON T.V.. OTHERS HE ZHINKS HE ZAW YOU ON T.V.. BIXBY I SAID TO HIM, “THAT’S RIGHT, THAT’S ME: THE MOST FAMOUS SPY… IN THE WORLD!” IN NORWAY, I SNUCK IN THROUGH THE FJORDS, INTO THE FAMOUS SUPER-SECRET SPY AWARDS. BIXBY/OTHERS AWARDS. BIXBY IN SPITE OF MY GLAMOROUS GLOBAL FAME, I STOOD THERE INCOGNITO AS THEY CALLED MY NAME. THEN, JUMPING OUT IN TUX AND TIE, I SAID, “IT’S ME, YOUR FAV-‘RITE SECRET FAMOUS SPY!” AND ON MY FANCY WINNER’S PLAQUE, OTHERS AND ON HIS FANCY WINNER’S PLAQUE… BIXBY IT SAYS RIGHT THERE, IN BRONZE AND BLACK: THE MOST FAMOUS SPY IN THE… HE DRINKS A COSMO ON A BEACH IN GREECE. THE MOST FAMOUS SPY… HE DRIVES AN ASTON MARTIN ON A TWO-YEAR LEASE. THE MOST FAMOUS SPY… IN THE WORLD! |
(For another random link, click here.)