Unless... (excerpt)
UNLESS HE’S TALL AND PALE,
AND IF HE WENT TO YALE.
UNLESS HE’S TERRIBLY COURAGEOUS WHEN HE’S HUNTING QUAIL.
THEN MAYBE HE COULD PUT THE FIZZY IN MY GIN AND FIZZ.
AND WE’LL HAVE SMOKING JACKETS MONOGRAMMED WITH “HIS” AND “HIS”.
NO, NO, I TAKE IT BACK.
THERE’S NO WAY I WOULD ACQUIESCE.
UNLESS UNLESS UNLESS UNLESS UNLESS...
UNLESS HE’S TALL AND PALE,
AND IF HE WENT TO YALE.
UNLESS HE’S TERRIBLY COURAGEOUS WHEN HE’S HUNTING QUAIL.
THEN MAYBE HE COULD PUT THE FIZZY IN MY GIN AND FIZZ.
AND WE’LL HAVE SMOKING JACKETS MONOGRAMMED WITH “HIS” AND “HIS”.
NO, NO, I TAKE IT BACK.
THERE’S NO WAY I WOULD ACQUIESCE.
UNLESS UNLESS UNLESS UNLESS UNLESS...
Unless... - clip (from The Rocking Horse Winner) Lyrics by David Rackoff, Music by Sahara Sunday Spain
Quarter Pounder Cheeseburger (excerpt)
IN INDIA IF YOU ASKED FOR A QUARTER POUND OF BEEF AND CHEESE,
THEY'D SNEER AT YOU AND JUST GIVE YOU A HUNDRED GRAMS OF SPICY PEAS.
IN BOMBAY, YOU'LL SPEND THE DAY JUST SIPPING AT A SOUPY VENUE.
SPEND A POUND, FOR SOUPS ABOUND WHEN ORDERED FROM THE "RUPEE MENU".
TO ORDER SCOTCH NOT MADE BY SCOTS IS NOT JUST RUDE BUT RISKY, DEAR.
AND BOURBON FROM A PLACE BESIDE KENTUCKY IS JUST WHISKEY, DEAR.
BORDEAUX-IANS IN BORDEAUX FRANCE MAKE BORDEAUX SUCH A HEARTY WINE.
CHAMPAGNE THAT'S NOT FROM CHAMPAGNE FRANCE IS JUST A GASSY, FARTY WINE.
IN INDIA IF YOU ASKED FOR A QUARTER POUND OF BEEF AND CHEESE,
THEY'D SNEER AT YOU AND JUST GIVE YOU A HUNDRED GRAMS OF SPICY PEAS.
IN BOMBAY, YOU'LL SPEND THE DAY JUST SIPPING AT A SOUPY VENUE.
SPEND A POUND, FOR SOUPS ABOUND WHEN ORDERED FROM THE "RUPEE MENU".
TO ORDER SCOTCH NOT MADE BY SCOTS IS NOT JUST RUDE BUT RISKY, DEAR.
AND BOURBON FROM A PLACE BESIDE KENTUCKY IS JUST WHISKEY, DEAR.
BORDEAUX-IANS IN BORDEAUX FRANCE MAKE BORDEAUX SUCH A HEARTY WINE.
CHAMPAGNE THAT'S NOT FROM CHAMPAGNE FRANCE IS JUST A GASSY, FARTY WINE.
Quarter Pounder Cheeseburger - clip (from Gilbert & Sullivan's Pulp Fiction) Lyrics by David Rackoff, Music by Sir Arthur Sullivan
The World's Most Famous Spy (excerpt)
MY FAME IS A BLESSING, AND A CURSE.
WENT UNDERCOVER AS A FILIPINA NURSE.
HOT NURSE!
A DOCTOR WAS TRYING TO KILL THE POPE.
I STRANGLED OUT THE DOCTOR WITH A STETHOSCOPE.
HE SAID TO ME, ABOUT TO DIE,
“YOU’RE NOT A NURSE, NO, YOU’RE ZHAT VERY FAMOUS SPY.
I ZHINK I ZAW YOU ON T.V..
OTHERS
HE ZHINKS HE ZAW YOU ON T.V..
BIXBY
I SAID TO HIM, “THAT’S RIGHT, THAT’S ME:
THE MOST FAMOUS SPY…
IN THE WORLD!”
MY FAME IS A BLESSING, AND A CURSE.
WENT UNDERCOVER AS A FILIPINA NURSE.
HOT NURSE!
A DOCTOR WAS TRYING TO KILL THE POPE.
I STRANGLED OUT THE DOCTOR WITH A STETHOSCOPE.
HE SAID TO ME, ABOUT TO DIE,
“YOU’RE NOT A NURSE, NO, YOU’RE ZHAT VERY FAMOUS SPY.
I ZHINK I ZAW YOU ON T.V..
OTHERS
HE ZHINKS HE ZAW YOU ON T.V..
BIXBY
I SAID TO HIM, “THAT’S RIGHT, THAT’S ME:
THE MOST FAMOUS SPY…
IN THE WORLD!”
The World's Most Famous Spy - clip (from Nothing Like Broadway) Music & Lyrics by David Rackoff
My Horsey for a Kingdom (excerpt)
LET OUR HEROISM TAKE US
TO THE FRONT LINES OF THE FRACAS.
HIDE YOUR PITY AND REMORSE, MEN,
FROM THE OPPOSITION’S HORSEMEN.
MORE OR LESS, WE WILL BE MORE FAIR.
WHILE WE WAGE A “WITTLE” WARFARE.
SMOKE ‘EM EVERYONE WHO BRINGED ‘EM.
TRADE MY HORSEY FOR A KINGDOM?
WHEN WE HEED MY CALL FOR WARTIME,
WE’LL BE MARCHING FORTH IN FOUR-TIME.
LET OUR HEROISM TAKE US
TO THE FRONT LINES OF THE FRACAS.
HIDE YOUR PITY AND REMORSE, MEN,
FROM THE OPPOSITION’S HORSEMEN.
MORE OR LESS, WE WILL BE MORE FAIR.
WHILE WE WAGE A “WITTLE” WARFARE.
SMOKE ‘EM EVERYONE WHO BRINGED ‘EM.
TRADE MY HORSEY FOR A KINGDOM?
WHEN WE HEED MY CALL FOR WARTIME,
WE’LL BE MARCHING FORTH IN FOUR-TIME.
My Horsey for a Kingdom - clip (from The Tyrant of Wonderland) Lyrics by David Rackoff, Music by Sahara Sunday Spain
Do You Have Any Siblings? (excerpt)
MY DINNERS AS A SINGLE MAN DO NOT GO VERY WELL;
HOT POCKETS ON THE TOILET WHILE I LISTEN TO ADELE.
REMEMBER MY EX-GIRLFRIEND? DID I SAY HER NAME IS CLAIRE?
I'M SO GLAD I'VE MOVED ON. OH WAIT, SHE'S SITTING OVER THERE!
MY DINNERS AS A SINGLE MAN DO NOT GO VERY WELL;
HOT POCKETS ON THE TOILET WHILE I LISTEN TO ADELE.
REMEMBER MY EX-GIRLFRIEND? DID I SAY HER NAME IS CLAIRE?
I'M SO GLAD I'VE MOVED ON. OH WAIT, SHE'S SITTING OVER THERE!
Do You Have Any Siblings - clip Lyrics by David Rackoff, Music by Sahara Sunday Spain
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